Dragonmaster - A Pern Fan Fiction Adventure
by Dragonsight Elli
Summary: Did Kitti Ping Yung really understand the evolutionary potential of the dragons she created? Could they sing? What about composing music? Anything is certainly possible, including a dragon who teaches other dragons!
1. Chapter 1 - The First Lesson

_**Chapter 1 – The First Lesson**_

How the Billy-Bob Joe am I to extract information from Elli's mind while she's sleeping? I need it for this morning's lesson. It'll be my first. Every time I do it, she stirs in her sleep. The final time I try, she wakes up entirely.

"What're you doing, Chlori?" she asks sleepily.

_Trying to extract information from you for my first lesson_, I say apologetically.

"Can't you do that when I'm awake?" she murmurs grumpily.

_My lesson starts in the morning, _I explain. _I need to study myself before I teach anyone else._

"I thought there was an emergency," Elli sighs. "Go ahead. G'narish'll probably wake up with another nightmare soon."

_His dreams are pleasant tonight,_ I report. _He's talking to D'nag like they're reuniting after a long time apart._

"That's gonna be sad for him when he wakes," she laments. "I'm gonna have to comfort him yet again."

_You like comforting people,_ I protest. _You like when they cry on your shoulder, when their tears hit your skin, when they cling to you for dear life, don't you?_

"Of course, I do," she tells me. "I love it, but he does it all the time, and there seems to be no way to heal him. It's been four years, and he's still nowhere near healing. No one should have to suffer that long!"

_Agreed,_ I reassure her, _but the healing process is a slow one. Brekke and Lytol lost their dragons ages ago, and they're still not healed._

Elli sighs as G'narish stirs.

"If I could just go back in time and change what happened!" G'narish cries passionately, "then I could've had that talk for real!"

"I'm a firm believer that that was his spirit reaching out to you," Elli says gently. "He was trying to reach out of the hereafter to reassure you that he is at peace, and that you don't need to blame yourself for his death or be traumatized by it."

"Why did he take so damn long?!" G'narish complains.

"Perhaps he was trying to reach you all this time," Elli responds, draping a comforting arm across his shoulders, "but you weren't receptive to it."

"I'd never reject him!" G'narish moans passionately, breaking down. "That's like rejecting a dragon Impression."

Elli stops; her eyes welling up with tears. He has inadvertently reminded her of her near rejection of my impression. G'narish sees her blinking furiously and puts his arm around her.

"I'm so sorry, sweetheart," he mutters contritely, giving her a squeeze. "I know you can't forgive yourself for almost rejecting Chlorith. She forgives you, and that should be enough for you. She loves you so much! She'd forgive you for anything you do. You can do no wrong in her eyes. You are perfect! It is the same with all dragons and riders. I am perfect in Gyarmath's eyes, too, and you are perfect for me, too."

Elli smiles through her tears.

"Thanks, G," Elli says, smiling through her tears as she returns the hug. "But now, let's try to go back to sleep, my heart." Turning to me, she asks, "Did you get enough info, my Chlori?"

_I haven't even started yet_, I complain. _You were too distressed for me to extract anything from your mind._

"Then start and lemme get back to sleep," Elli petulantly complains. "I'm 50 years old, and I'm pregnant!"

_You're not an old fart if you can still reproduce,_ I say as I delve deeply into Elli's mind.

The info I find in there is astonishing! She was blind from birth, so she learned Braille instead of print. No dragon can read because they probably couldn't hold paper or hide, but I think they have the capacity for it. If I could learn the letters and numbers, I could read to my rider, and she wouldn't have to rely on audiobooks all her life. She'd hold the book in her hands, and I'd extract the letters from her mind.

"How would that work if I can't see the letters?" Elli demands skeptically.

_If I can see the book in your lap, I can see the letters and numbers on the page in front of you,_ I respond, unperturbed. _Somebody else will have to teach me to read. Dragons can't write, but I could guide your hand with my mind to write the letters on the page._

"Chlori!" Elli exclaims, forgetting all about sleep. "That's a bloody brilliant idea! Since you can hear G'narish, he can teach you to read, or Lessa or Brekke!"

_Raeana can speak to all dragons as well as the twins,_ I remind her.

"I want G'narish," Elli whines petulantly. "He's my weyrmate, and he needs something to occupy himself so he doesn't brood over D'nag so much."

_C says 'ca' and c says 'ssssss'._ I report to Elli to let her know that I'm beginning my new experiment. _Why does K also say 'ca'? S also hisses like a tunnel-snake. Letters are crazy!_

"I can teach you all about the sounds the letters make," Elli says in wonder, "but what I can't teach you is what they look like."

_That's alright_, I say to her. _You cannot see the letters on the page or screen, but I can, and I will teach you once I learn myself. You will see the letters and numbers through my eyes so you will be able to read print material._

I can tell Elli is still skeptical, but she doesn't say anything. She lets me extract more information from her mind as she begins to relax, warming to my touch as she did on Impression Day. With me still in her mind, she falls asleep, dreaming of all the information I took from her.

Dragonmaster.

_**Chapter 3 - tbd**_

As the days wear on into sevendays, our progress is slow but steady. Kit ping yung would have rolled over in her grave if she knew some of the things i was teaching my fellow dragons. with G'narish's help, I am learning how to read & passing the knowledge to my cohorts. I extract math from. Both Elli & G'narish's minds, as G'narish is better working equations than Elli is. She was never a good problem solver, always expecting everyone else to do it for her, but that's how she was raised. She was limited because of her disability. Until she came to pern she never new her potential. She quickly learned to fend for herself when she Impressed me, and she hasn't looked bak since.

Today is G'narish's Impression day, & Elli's got a big feast planned. She wants to celebrate the way we did in Igen. Ever since D'nag died, Elli noticed that he goes off by himself every turn, and she wants to stop that. She wants him to have a good time on the anniversary of his Impression of Gyarmath. Mom & Manora are pulling out all the stops in the kitchens to make sure G'narish's favorite foods are ready in time. Mom & Elli can't stand hot, spicy foods, so Mom's also cooking some alternatives for them to eat. We've also invited Raeana to come to the feast. Elli would call it a party, but the pernese call it a Gather. Hanshu doesn't have many Gathers, so we are expecting a whole bunch of people & dragons. I'm going to tae the opportunity to exchange more knowledge while swimming with the dolphins. Perhaps the dolphins can teach all of us something new.

Once again, G'narish excuses himself in the middle of the meal. Determined to discover why he's all by himself, Elli also excuses herself & goes off in search of G'narish.

She finds him in our weyr, face buried in Gyarmath's nek, on the verge of a breakdown. "Sweetheart, what's wrong? You do this every turn on your Impression Day. Do you not like that we celebrate your special day?"

"I'm sorry, Elli." G'narish sniffs miserably; "It's not that, it's just that ... well ... D'nag Impressed the same day I did, and now he can't be here to spend it with me."

"Do you want me to leave you?" Elli asks, hoping with all her heart that he won't.

"No, of course not!" G'narish cries, coming ever closer to tears. "I just go off by myself because I don't want to break down in front of the whole Gather, but I need someone to let it out with , to talk about him to, just to be with me as i remember him, but I don't want the entire Gather to see me like this." A slow tear trickles down his cheek despite all his efforts to keep them bak.

'Do you want to be held/". Asks Elli,, unsure of what to do. G'narish reaches out to her but she cannot see it, so I send her the image of his arms reaching out. Elli swiftly walks over to him & throws her arms around him, kissing the tear away from his cheek. ' "I knew him for seven Turns." She says softly. "Definitely not as long as you did, but I still hav some memories of him. He was a valiant Wing-Second, and he was a good friend to you. I was in the room when I recorded you guys. I saw his true colors. He was serious when he needed to be & funny when he wanted to be. He was a perfet human specimen. You two were perfect soul mates, and it's totally natural that you would miss him today."

"He was like my brother!" G'narish sobs, exploding into tears. Elli leads him to the bed, sits him down, & rocks him gently in her arms as he prattles on & on about D'nag, who was two years his senior, & knew everything! G'narish had an older sister, but she died early in childhood from complications from the birth. D'nag's mother had given birth to him the same day but had died. Cassandria had basically adopted D'nag, so the two had lived as brothers. His sobs intensify as he talks, & Elli holds him even tighter. I have a daring idea. It is noted that dragons have no musical abilities, but if I can dance, why can't I sing as well? I know we can't physically sing, but what about mentally? I take a deep mental breath, & begin singing the song that's running through Elli's head.

"Remember, I will still be here,

As long as you hold me, in your memory.

Remember, when your dreams have ended, time can be transcended. Just remember me. ...".

"I never sang it in that key before." Elli says, bewildered. "That key's too high for my voice range."

"That voice is a version of what you will be at the end of Shonegar's tutilage." G'narish sniffs, "and the song totally fits right now. He is all it proclaims; the last star to fall, the voice that whispers in the silence. '.

'and he will continue to be all that as long as you remember him." Elli says softly. "I've been trying to tell you that for ages & ages!"

"That angelic voice is making me cry again." G'narish says, breaking into tears once more.

"I used to be able to make people cry with my voice." She says. "Then i lost it."

"It came back," G'narish says softly through his tears. "That voice sounds remarkably like yours with more fluidity. You got the melisma down too."

"I've never heard you sing before either." Elli says, changing the subject.

"I'm definitely not as good as Master Shonegar, but if I can ever stop crying, I'll sing something. Tears aren't good on the throat. They coat the throat block it up."

"You really shoulda gone to the Harperhall." Elli says in amazement.

"I should've, but I Impressed, and that put an end to that."

"Why don't you take voice lessons with me?" Asks Elli. "We could sing duets together like married couples are supposed to." G'narish laughs through his tears, & Elli smiles gently bak at him.

"There we go. That's better." She says, as though he's a child coming down from a crying jag. 'I'm right here."

As am I, I say softly.

and I, Gyarmath rejoins. We're all here for you, G'narish.

Did you like my song? I ask eagerly. Did it fit the mode?

"It most certainly did, but dragons can't sing. How on Pern did you do it?"

"I modulated my mental voice the way humans modulate their physical voices. I didn't know I could do it either, but if we can speak mentally, why on Pern can't we sing?

"We must share this development." Elli says. "This is a very momentous occasion. It must be announced immediately."

"I'm not ready yet." Sobs G'narish, breaking down again. "Will you sing it again, please, Chlorith?" I do, he sobs until he falls asleep in Elli's arms. She lays him genty on the bed & tucks him in like a small child. She takes his hand & holds it tightly, keeping vigil over his bedside. There's a knock on the door.

"Don't come in,". Elli says; "G'narish is asleep."

"Mom". It's Raeana. "Is everything okay?" Elli slowly lets go of G'narish's hand to attend to her daughter.

'Impression day is hard for him because D'nag Impressed on the same day and now he's not here to share it with G'narish."""

"I didn't know that." Says Raeana sadly. 'Is he okay?"

"He will be." Elli says reassuringly. "He cried himself to sleep just now, and I don't want to wake him for fear he starts up again."

"I get worried when he does this." Raeana says softly. "He's the only daddy I have. I left my real daddy on Earth."

"Do you still miss him?" Elli asks solicitously.

"Sometimes,," says Raeana. "I wish I could tell him I Impressed a queen dragon, and that he has grandchildren. I don't think he & Kathryn could have children."

"i'm always here for you, darling." Says Elli tenderly. "I will always love you, & so will G'narish. We're a happy family now, no fighting, no screaming, no yelling, no crying. I couldn't ask for a better arrangement."

"Me too." Says Raeana happily; "but I always worry about Daddy G'narish. But if I have a son next time I'm naming him David."

"I think G'bare will insist on a more traditional name for the first boy, like G'rae or something. G'raeanan, I don't know. I seriously don't know how you'd split your names up to create a new one.""

"Miroirth rises son." Says Raeana mischievously. "Perhaps I'll get G'bare to give me a son to go with my three daughters." Elli smiles.


	2. Chapter 2 - Today's Lesson

_**Chapter 2 – Today's Lessons**_

"I don't hear Chlorith teaching," Elli petulantly complains, interrupting the flow of my thoughts. "I was expecting to hear her voice droning on and on and putting me to sleep like my high school teachers did."

_We are exchanging information and ideas through images and sounds,_ I explain. _Some dragons are sending images their riders saw in the AIVAS files. Others are sending images from their riders' past experiences. It is very fruitful and productive that way._

"I would say so!" Elli agrees amiably. "I wish I'd learned that way. How would you teach history?"

_That'll be left up to the imagination,_ I say. _Whatever we picture from the records our riders read or saw from the AIVAS files. Sometimes, humans create images based on the definitions of words. For example, you know what war is by definition. It is when men and women go out on the field and kill each other because their nations or planets are having an argument. Because you know that definition, you can imagine the carnage that ensues, so you send that picture to your students._

Elli pauses once again, the way she always does when she is amazed by me. I don't know why she's always so amazed by me. It is as though she limits my abilities in her mind because I'm a dragon, created by her descendants. She doesn't take into effect the evolution of our species. I have noticed she also does this with the blind triplets. She needs to stop that. She is also blind and look what she has achieved.

"Chlorith, you never cease to amaze me!" she says after a moment's reflection. "Every day I'm just floored by you. You're the smartest dragon on Pern. Sometimes I think you expect too much of your kind, because they're not as smart as you are."

_They were never stretched to their highest potential,_ I reply. _I intend to do that now with these lessons. Now, please, let me get back to work. This is a slow, drawn-out process._

Elli grins, gives my eye ridge a gentle scratch, and goes to check in on G'narish, whom she had left sleeping to check on me. She finds him awake, brewing a pot of klah and talking to Cilyntia in the little alcove of our quarters. We have been allotted the quarters F'lessan has dubbed the Weyrleader and Weyrwoman's quarters, because we stepped down from that job to come here. When he rebuilt Honshu after D'lan's attack, he had placed a tiny kitchen alcove in our quarters so the former Weyrleader and Weyrwoman would not have to leave for meals. He even built a conveyer system like all the fighting Weyrs have. G'narish had apparently called for klah bark and a pot of water so he could make a fresh pot for himself, Elli, and the children. The little ones are too young yet for klah, but the older children can drink it.

"Ever since Impressing Curreth, I'm much braver than I was," Cilyntia is saying reflectively as she takes a turn at stirring the contents of the klah pot. "I'm not so afraid of men anymore, and I look forward to riding a dragon now, but I'm sure I'll go to pieces when she rises to mate."

"You'll be fine, dear heart," G'narish reassures her tenderly. "I'll be watching to make sure a decent rider's bronze flies your queen."

"Promise?" Cilyntia begs him with her eyes.

"You have three years to go before you need to worry about that, but I promise I won't let any bullies fly Curreth."

"She is so beautiful!" Cilyntia sighs, giving the pot a final stir. "Klah's ready, by the way. I have to go oil her now, but I'll be back when she falls asleep. I love you, Daddy."

She kisses him on the cheek and rushes out to take care of her one-day-old Hatchling. Elli rushes to give him a good morning hug, pour herself a cup of klah with a device that beeps when the cup is full. She sits next to him at the table and puts her arm around him as she waits for her cup to cool down a little.

"Thanks, sweetheart, I needed that," G'narish says, returning the hug. "Never leave me!"

"I promise I will never leave you, not even if Chlorith mates away from Gyarmath!"

_I would never mate away from Gyarmath!_ I bugle indignantly. _I love him! He dances with me, and he's still young enough to catch me._

"He only mates because he's trying to catch you!" Elli rejoins, smiling.

_And he is the only one I'll let fly me,_ I proclaim. _No other bronze will be allowed to have me! If he goes 'between' before I stop rising, I'll make myself stop! Canth did._

"How's school going?" asks Elli.

_I can multitask,_ I reply, sighing mentally, _but some of my pupils have fallen asleep. Most of those are dragonets or the very old, but the others have stayed up for the barrage of images and sounds we're exchanging. I will have to stop pretty soon because Benden Weyr expects Threadfall in a few hours, and the dragons have to prepare for that._

"Well, then, I'd say today's lessons went pretty well," Elli happily responds. "Remember to give them quizzes to see if they remembered their images. Most dragons have very poor memories."

_I'm well aware of that,_ I tell her. _They need to strengthen them over time. That's something no one's ever practiced with them because they thought if their memories improved they wouldn't want to fight Thread. I may have a good memory, but for the life of me, I cannot remember what it's like to fight Thread._

G'narish stiffens under Elli's arm.

"Chlori, he can hear you," Elli reminds me. "You said the t-word twice."

_When can we start desensitization therapy with him?_ I complain petulantly. _It's the only way to heal him from his PTSD. We have no medicines, so we have to rely on that!_

"Oh, alright," Elli concedes. "I just don't want to see him suffer any more than he already has."

_He will at first,_ I remind her, _but he'll gradually get better. Perhaps if we sent soothing images to go with the desensitization therapy, it will go more smoothly._

"That's hypnotism… and that's misleading," Elli tells me flatly. "If you send him images of swimming while we're fighting the T-word, he'll lose focus."

"I can't fight Thread anymore, girls," G'narish says calmly. "It brings back too many memories."

Elli throws her arms around G'narish, spilling her klah all over the floor, not caring, weeping with pure joy.

"You said it! You said it!" she sobs ecstatically. "That's the first step to healing! You sharding said it!"

"I did, didn't I?" he says, hugging her. "I don't think I'll ever get over what happened to D'nag, but I can hear and say the word again."

Elli calls for a mop and broom to clean up her mess but still can't let go of G'narish.

"I'll take care of that," he offers. "You're too shaky."


	3. Chapter 3 - Impression Day

_**Chapter 3 – Impression Day**_

As the days wear on into sevendays, our progress is slow but steady. Kit Ping Yung would have rolled over in her grave if she knew some of the things I was teaching my fellow dragons. With G'narish's help, I am learning how to read and passing the knowledge to my cohorts. I extract math from both Elli's and G'narish's minds, as G'narish is better at working equations than Elli is. She was never a good problem solver, always expecting everyone else to do it for her, but that's how she was raised. She was limited because of her disability. Until she came to Pern, she never knew her potential. She quickly learned to fend for herself when she Impressed me, and she hasn't looked back since.

Today is G'narish's Impression day, and Elli's got a big feast planned. She wants to celebrate the way we did in Igen. Ever since D'nag died, Elli noticed that he goes off by himself every Turn, and she wants to stop that. She wants him to have a good time on the anniversary of his Impression of Gyarmath. Elli's Mom and Manora are pulling out all the stops in the kitchens to make sure G'narish's favorite foods are ready in time. Elli and her Mom can't stand hot, spicy foods, so they're also cooking some alternatives for them to eat. Additionally, we've invited Raeana to come to the feast. Elli would call it a party, but the Pernese call it a Gather. Honshu doesn't have many Gathers, so we are expecting a whole bunch of people and dragons. I'm going to take the opportunity to exchange more knowledge while swimming with the dolphins. Perhaps the dolphins can teach all of us something new.

Once again, G'narish excuses himself in the middle of the meal. Determined to discover why he's all by himself, Elli also excuses herself and goes off in search of G'narish.

She finds him in our weyr, face buried in Gyarmath's neck, on the verge of a breakdown.

"Sweetheart, what's wrong?" she asks him, a comforting hand resting on his shoulder. "You do this every Turn on your Impression Day. Do you not like that we celebrate your special day?"

"I'm sorry, Elli," G'narish sniffs miserably. "It's not that, it's just that ... well ... D'nag Impressed the same day I did, and now he can't be here to spend it with me."

"Do you want me to leave you?" Elli asks, hoping with all her heart that he won't.

"No, of course not!" G'narish cries, coming ever closer to tears. "I just go off by myself because I don't want to break down in front of the whole Gather, but I need someone to let it out with , to talk about him to, just to be with me as I remember him, but I don't want the entire Gather to see me like this."

A slow tear trickles down his cheek despite all his efforts to keep them back.

"Do you want to be held?" asks Elli, unsure of what to do.

G'narish reaches out to her, but she cannot see it. So, I send her the image of his arms reaching out. Elli swiftly walks over to him and throws her arms around him, kissing the tear away from his cheek.

"I knew him for seven Turns," she says softly. "Definitely not as long as you did, but I still have some memories of him. He was a valiant Wing-Second, and he was a good friend to you. I was in the room when I recorded you guys. I saw his true colors. He was serious when he needed to be and funny when he wanted to be. He was a perfect human specimen. You two were perfect soul mates, and it's totally natural that you would miss him today."

"He was like my brother!" G'narish sobs, exploding into tears.

Elli leads him to the bed, sits him down, and rocks him gently in her arms as he prattles on and on about D'nag, who was two years his senior, and knew everything! G'narish had an older sister, but she died early in childhood from complications from the birth. D'nag's mother had given birth to him the same day but had died. Cassandria had basically adopted D'nag, so the two had lived as brothers. His sobs intensify as he talks, and Elli holds him even tighter.

I have a daring idea. It is noted that dragons have no musical abilities, but if I can dance, why can't I sing as well? I know we can't physically sing, but what about mentally? I take a deep mental breath and begin singing the song that's running through Elli's head.

"Remember, I will still be here,

As long as you hold me in your memory.

Remember, when your dreams have ended,

time can be transcended.

Just remember me…"

"I never sang it in that key before," Elli says, bewildered. "That key's too high for my voice range."

"That voice is a version of where you will be at the end of Shonagar's tutelage," G'narish sniffs, "and the song totally fits right now. He is all it proclaims; the last star to fall, the voice that whispers in the silence."

"And he will continue to be all that as long as you remember him," Elli says softly. "I've been trying to tell you that for ages and ages!"

"That angelic voice is making me cry again," G'narish says, breaking into tears once more.

"I used to be able to make people cry with my voice," Elli sighs with regret. "Then, I lost it."

"It came back," G'narish says softly through his tears. "That voice sounds remarkably like yours with more fluidity. You got the melisma down, too."

"I've never heard you sing before, either," Elli says, changing the subject.

"I'm definitely not as good as Master Shonagar," G'narish mutters, shaking his head, "but if I can ever stop crying, I'll sing something. Tears aren't good on the throat. They coat the throat, block it up."

"You really should've gone to the Harper Hall," Elli says in amazement.

"I should've, but I Impressed, and that put an end to that."

"Why don't you take voice lessons with me?" asks Elli. "We could sing duets together like married couples are supposed to."

G'narish laughs through his tears and Elli smiles gently back at him.

"There we go. That's better," she says, as though he's a child coming down from a crying jag. "I'm right here."

_As am I_, I add softly.

_And I_, Gyarmath joins in. _We're all here for you, G'narish._

_Did you like my song?_ I ask eagerly. _Did it fit the mood?_

"It most certainly did, but dragons can't sing. How on Pern did you do it?"

_I modulated my mental voice the way humans modulate their physical voices,_ I reply. _I didn't know I could do it either, but if we can speak mentally, why on Pern can't we sing?_

"We must share this development," Elli says. "This is a very momentous occasion. It must be announced immediately."

"I'm not ready yet," sobs G'narish, breaking down again. "Will you sing it again, please, Chlorith?"

I do. G'narish sobs until he falls asleep in Elli's arms. She lays him gently on the bed and tucks him in like a small child. She takes his hand and holds it tightly, keeping vigil over his bedside. There's a knock on the door.

"Don't come in," Elli quietly calls out. "G'narish is asleep."

"Mom?" It's Raeana. "Is everything okay?"

Elli slowly lets go of G'narish's hand to attend to her daughter.

"Impression Day is hard for him because D'nag Impressed on the same day," Elli explains once she joins her daughter out in the hall and closes the door behind her. "And now he's not here to share it with G'narish."

"I didn't know that," Raeana whispers, saddened by the news. "Is he okay?"

"He will be," Elli says reassuringly. "He cried himself to sleep just now, and I don't want to wake him for fear he starts up again."

"I get worried when he does this," Raeana says softly. "He's the only daddy I have. I left my real daddy on Earth."

"Do you still miss him?" Elli asks solicitously.

"Sometimes," Raeana admits. "I wish I could tell him I Impressed a queen dragon, and that he has grandchildren. I don't think he and Kathryn could have children."

"I'm always here for you, darling." Elli assures her, hugging Raeana tenderly. "I will always love you, and so will G'narish. We're a happy family now… no fighting, no screaming, no yelling, no crying. I couldn't ask for a better arrangement."

"Me,too," says Raeana happily, "but I always worry about Daddy G'narish. If I have a son next time, I'm naming him David."

"I think G'bare will insist on a more traditional name for the first boy," Elli chuckles, "like G'rae or something. G'raeanan, I don't know. I seriously don't know how you'd split your names up to create a new one."

"Miroirth raises her son," says Raeana mischievously. "Perhaps I'll get G'bare to give me a son to go with my three daughters."

Elli smiles.


	4. Chapter 4 - Drastic Measures

_**Chapter 4 – Drastic Measures**_

I hear Calentia crying yet again. She doesn't have the ability to speak to any dragon, so I ask Zareth what's wrong.

_She is worried about G'narish again,_ Zareth says sadly. _She wants to help him, and she doesn't know how._

_He's got to fight Thread,_ I tell her. _It's the only way to conquer his fear. But we've got to take it slow. Right now, we have to occupy him during Threadfall so that he doesn't have flashbacks. Once he no longer has flashbacks during Threadfall, we can slowly get him to fight again. He's getting old, but F'lar's even older than he is, and he's still fighting. I think it would make him feel better to fight, but we have to take it slow._

I get the impression that Zareth doesn't hear the part where I said we have to take it slow. She gets all excited and tells Calentia what to do. Zareth has a mischievous streak that Calentia only adopted after she had Impressed her. Threadfall is tomorrow so she makes her plan quickly.

The next day, everybody's getting ready to fight. The riders at Monaco Weyr are supplementing the few riders who fight at Honshu. Elli and Tiffany can't fight because they're pregnant, so Calentia's the only queen rider able to fight. She still fights; she just can't bear to be at Igen Weyr. Ariana and Oriana cannot fight because they're still too young. Calentia takes flight, flamethrower strapped to her back, ready to put her plan into action. About an hour into the fall, she suddenly comes in for a crash landing. G'narish is there in an instant, lifting her off Zareth's back, weeping copiously.

"G'narish, you must take my place!" she whispers as though she is dying. "If you don't fight, I will have died in vain. D'nag would want you to fight. Fight for him. Fight for me."

She goes limp in his arms. It is too early for rigor mortis to set in, but he thinks she is truly dead. Sobbing uncontrollably, he takes her to her bed and lays her down.

"I will fight, Cally," he sobs, planting a tender kiss on her forehead. "I promise!"

He doesn't see her smile as he runs off to collect his flying gear.

As he takes wing, Calentia rises from bed. She is very much alive and only mildly scored. She applies numbweed then goes to see Elli, who had been sleeping throughout the exchange and was therefore unaware of the plan.

"Shouldn't you be out fighting Fall?" Elli inquires sleepily. "Where's your father?"

"He thinks I died of Threadscore," Calentia tells her. "He's out fighting. He's honoring my last request."

"Calentia Nadira!" Elli shouts. "How horrible can you get? That was a Seska move right there!"

"Something had to be done," Calentia argues, pleading with her sky-blue eyes. "Once he gets out there, that PTSD will be gone! He needs to get over this!"

"He will never get over it, but he will get past it," Elli replies, struggling to bring her anger under control. "We have to take it slow, Cally. If you take it too fast, you'll only make it worse. That's why we tried to occupy him during Threadfall so he doesn't have flashbacks. Then, once he sees Thread and doesn't have them, we can see if he will fight. He's got to do it on his own initiative, Cally. You can't force him to do it."

"He could've rejected my request," Calentia says belligerently. "He loves me so much that he'll fight for me because he thinks I'm dead."

Calentia has never been this stubborn before. I'm guessing through Elli's thoughts that she never realized how much G'narish's PTSD had hurt Calentia. She can't stand to watch people suffer without being able to do something about it. Elli is the same way, but G'narish repeatedly runs to her whenever he has flashbacks.

"Chlorith, how's G'narish doing?" Elli asks me.

_Gyarmath is glad to be in the air again,_ I report, _but he has to do everything, because G'narish is too tear-blinded to see the Thread_.

"I wish I were up there with him," Elli mutters helplessly. "If I weren't pregnant, I could be by his side."

The wait for the end of the Fall is agonizing for both women. When it finally comes, Elli rushes out to meet G'narish and Gyarmath. She helps him dismount and throws her arms around him.

"Where's my daughter?" G'narish demands in a quavery voice, tears dripping down his cheeks. "Where's my Calentia?"

"I'll take you to her," Elli gushes gently.

She puts her arm around his shoulders and leads him back inside, where Calentia has brewed a pot of klah. G'narish tries to go into her Weyr, but Elli leads him back to our weyr instead. There is Calentia, sitting on the bed, slathered unnecessarily in numbweed to make her injuries look much worse than they really are.

"Calentia?" G'narish's voice is tentative, not believing his own eyes. "I thought you were dead! I didn't stay long enough to see Zareth suicide."

"How was Fall, Daddy?" asks Calentia tentatively. "Are you feeling better now?"

G'narish's face turns brick red, but it doesn't stop there. It goes right to a bright maroon before it finally stops.

"Calentia Nadira!"

G'narish's voice is like a huge clap of thunder! His fists are raised, his face suffused with rage.

"How dare you?" he rages, standing over the girl. "How dare you pretend to die! How dare you make me fight when you know I can't ever do it again? You know how much Thread terrifies me! You know how D'nag's death affects me!"

"But you did it anyway," Calentia says quietly, terrified herself by his wrath. "You did it for me and D'nag. You might've wept the whole time, but you still went out there and flamed Thread. Once you do it a few more times, you'll be used to it again. Then, your PTSD will be cured."

"Why, Calentia?" G'narish's voice is now deathly quiet, the way it was when he slit Eliana's throat. "Why now, and why did you use such tactics?"

"I thought it was the only way for you to start fighting," Calentia whispers, now on the verge of tears.

"To pretend to die? Haven't I lost enough loved ones?"

"I believe you have," Elli softly intercedes, "and don't look at me like that! I wasn't involved in the plan. I didn't know she was going to do it until she already had. Then I counseled her against it because you already have lost enough people in your life… Nadira, D'nag, Seska, and your unborn son. That's plenty enough to lose already. You don't need to lose anymore."

Calentia bursts into tears and tries to flee the room, but G'narish catches her in a terrifyingly fierce grip.

"I'm not finished with you!" he bellows in her face. "Do you have any idea how hard that was? Do you have any notion of how petrified I was? You're right, I wept the entire time I was fighting Thread. I wanted the Thread to kill me like it killed you and D'nag. I wanted to go _between_ and stay there! How could you cause me such anguish? I thought you loved me!"

The anger vanishes to be replaced by such anguish and grief that it breaks Calentia's heart and sets Zareth keening.

"I thought you loved me," he says again in a choked voice.

Elli moves to hold him, but he pushes her away.

"I do love you, G'narish!" Calentia sobs. "That's why I did it! I can't watch you suffer anymore! I thought getting out there and fighting again would help you get better. I thought it would cure you! I wanted the old G'narish back!"

"I'm sorry I'm such a burden on you!" G'narish cries passionately. "I should just suicide now and relieve you of taking care of me!"

"No way, Jose!" Elli shouts, stomping her foot. "I will not allow that! How would our unborn children feel if they never met their father because he suicided while I was pregnant with them? I don't think so!"

"That'd make me feel worse!" Calentia blubbers. "I couldn't help you. I failed you!"

G'narish stops dead in his tracks, mouth hanging open like a volcano that has just finished its big eruption.

"You think you have to do it singlehandedly?" Now his voice is soft with a dawning comprehension. "You feel that if I don't get better that it's your fault?"

Calentia nods.

"It wouldn't be," he says much more gently, reaching for his daughter. "It's the illness. Some people recover from illnesses, some don't. Mental illness is like a physical illness. Look at Elli. She only recovered after Impressing Chlorith. She was on a load of meds before she Impressed. I saw her popping pills four times a day when we were on Earth. We couldn't replicate them on Pern, so she was an absolute basket case before she Impressed. My mental illness occurred many Turns after Impression, so obviously I can't be cured by that. All you can really do for me is help me through it, be there when I need you, listen when I vent, lend a shoulder when I cry, all that good stuff. I know Elli does a lot of that, but I feel safe with her because she suffered PTSD before she Impressed Chlorith."

"Over steps and curbs," Elli says bitterly. "I still have a fear of falling, but I don't go into panic attacks whenever I walk around Honshu. If I'm in a new environment I still have attacks, but if I'm somewhere familiar like Benden Weyr or Igen Weyr and I have my cane, I'm pretty good about knowing where I'm going. I haven't fallen down that spiral staircase yet, have I?"

"Only because F'lessan built a railing on both sides!" Calentia scoffs.

"Yes, I still need railings," Elli admits, "but I can run down the staircase now without any problems."

"I think Chlorith ought to have a class on mental illness tomorrow," Elli says reflectively, changing the subject. "Though it goes untreated, it still exists on Pern. If the dragons can raise awareness, perhaps the Pernese will do something about it. People need medicine and therapy, just as though they had a physical illness. I had five mental illnesses at one time before Impressing. I had bipolar disorder, borderline personality disorder, severe anxiety, depression, and PTSD. That's a lot to go through. I was on a whole host of meds. I'm sure everyone around me felt like failures too, because I was in the same rut all the time. It was a vicious cycle that couldn't be stopped because I couldn't tolerate change of any kind. I came here because I saw an opportunity to get out of that rut. I didn't fully come out of it until I Impressed."

Now G'narish reaches out for Elli and includes her in his embrace.

"That's why I run to her more than you," G'narish softly tells Calentia. "Plus, you're my daughter. Parents should never unburden themselves to their children."

"It's more of a burden to me if I can't help you," sobs Calentia miserably. "If parents give their children life, their children should give them something else in return. Please, let me help you! Please, let me hold you and comfort you when Elli's sleeping, because she does a lot of that lately."

G'narish smiles.

"I knew you wouldn't be able to rest comfortably with me suffering like this," he says, planting a tender kiss on her cheek. "I knew you'd want to help. I knew you'd need to do something. But next time, please don't do something drastic like that! I really thought you'd died, and I'd left before Zareth went _between_."

"If I had really died, Zareth would've gone simultaneously," Calentia laughs. "That should've been your first clue that something was up."

"To tell you the truth," G'narish says, hugging both women tighter, "I was having flashbacks the entire time. Every time Gyarmath flamed a clump of Thread, I saw D'nag being obliterated again and again. I couldn't get that image out of my head, and it was exacerbated by your death from Threadscore. When I returned home, I wanted to hold you in my arms one last time before I suicided. The fact that you are still alive saved my life. Losing a child never grows old for a parent. I never knew my son, but I still grieve for him, even though he died 35 Turns ago. Even though I disowned her for attempting to kill you, I still grieve for Seska. I still feel like I failed her because of the way she turned out. Now I want to keep all my children safe. I want to keep them from becoming like Seska. I want to protect all of you, especially from myself. People with PTSD sometimes have blackouts during flashbacks and end up killing their loved ones without knowing it. I don't ever want to do that!"

"You don't have blackouts, G'narish," Elli says.

"Yes, I do," argues G'narish. "I never know what I do during flashbacks."

"Fortunately, you just hold onto me with a death grip, because you think I'm D'nag and I'm being obliterated before your eyes."

"Thank the First Egg I don't hurt you!" G'narish sighs with relief.

"What do you do for him when that happens?" Calentia asks.

"Shh, shh, it's okay, sweetie. It's all over now. D'nag's dead. D'nag's gone..." Elli reels off. Shrugging, she adds, "Not that he hears a word of it."

"I cling to you afterward, because I'm scared," G'narish admits, tears sliding down his cheeks. "I find myself somewhere I didn't remember being and I knew I had a flashback, and it scares me because I don't know if I hurt you or not. I'm afraid if you leave me, it's because I did something wrong, and I'm afraid I'll never be able to get you back. I love you, Elli. I can't bear to lose you like I lost Nadira."

"You'll never lose me, Narish." Elli says tenderly.

"Nor I," Calentia fervently declares, giving G'narish a fierce hug.

"I will never leave you," the women chorus in unison.

Outside, on the ledge, we dragons bugle our agreement.


	5. Chapter 5 - Painful Composition

_**Chapter 5 – Painful Composition**_

I am in the middle of a lesson about mental illness the next day when I am interrupted by the sound of puking. Baby Andreas has been vomiting steadily for a sevenday. No one can figure out what's wrong with him. Elli is convinced he has the flu, but even I know the flu doesn't last that long. Her Mom thinks it might be a food allergy, but she doesn't know what he could be allergic to. Master Oldive has never dealt with allergies before, so he's flummoxed. Andreas can't even keep liquid down. All G'narish does is cry. He's convinced he's going to lose his son. He's lost so much weight that Elli could pick him up during the third trimester of her pregnancy. I try to go on with my lesson, but the baby is vomiting so hard that I can't concentrate. Elli's Mom hates vomit. Andreas throws up all over her as she tries to carry him off to the necessary. She grabs a piece of paper on the way there and writes a message to Oldive.

"Elli, would you get one of your fire-lizards to take a message to Oldive for me?" she begs her daughter. "Andi's throwing up some black stuff, and he can't breathe when he's throwing up. Can you get either Elizabeth or Marie-Antoinette to bring him my message and get him over here?"

"Add the words, 'Time it.', and I'll send it," Elli shouts with her anxiety.

She can no longer pretend it's the flu. People don't spew black bile when they have the flu. I decide to shift gears with my lesson today. I abandon my images of mental illness and begin to send images of healing and hospitals. Elli's been in the hospital a few times; most of them were because of her mental illness, but she had a couple times where she had surgeries done on her. She was awake during her c-section, but she only felt tingling because of the epidural they gave her. I don't know what an epidural is, but apparently it makes you numb all over when you're having a baby. They had read about them in the AIVAS files, and they gave them to Elli during all her deliveries. She felt minimal pain, and she says she'll have one for this delivery as well. I send images of Elli's c-section as well as her vaginal deliveries. The images are graphic, but all medical images are.

_Why do we have to learn all this?_ Golanth demands, disrupting the flow of my images.

_Because we can help our riders if we know the symptoms_, I reply.

_But we cannot do anything to heal people or dragons_, Golanth complains.

_I healed your wing, didn't I?_ I say. _We cannot do surgery, but we can perform therapy on patients. I used my foreclaws to manipulate joints. You can do the same thing. If our riders become wounded or ill with a medical condition, we can help healers discover what's wrong with them. We feel with our riders, do we not?_

_Of course we do, but we're too attached_, Golanth argues. We can't make any sense of what we're feeling.

_I can teach you how to detach yourselves from what's going on with your riders_, I explain. _I had to learn how to detach myself when Elli had fire-head. I was distraught, but I was also the one who recognized the symptoms. I told G'narish to get Sharra. I knew she was the healer who knew how to cure fire-head. He sent one of Elli's fire-lizards to Ruatha to get Sharra. G'narish can hear me because I am Gyarmath's weyrmate. If dragons can recognize their riders' symptoms, they can get help for them before they lose their minds because of their links with their riders._

_Okay,_ says Golanth, still unconvinced.

_You and F'lessan were wounded at the same time_, I continue to explain, _so you couldn't have gotten help for him. But if a dragon is wounded and another dragon recognizes the symptoms… or even if one dragon is too attached to his rider to recognize his symptoms but another dragon who is detached witnesses the illness, that detached dragon can get help by telling his rider what's going on with the sick rider and the healthy rider can summon a healer and tell him or her what's going on with the sick rider. We can save lives, Golanth. Tell F'lessan to help you by looking it up on the AIVAS website._

"Sorry, Mom, what did you say?" Elli asks. "Chlorith was talking in my head again. I can hear whatever she says even when she's talking to someone else. Andreas' sickness has inspired her to teach the dragons about healing. I was listening to her lecturing Golanth because he didn't think Chlorith should teach dragons about healing. He thought it was useless information because dragons can't heal people. She was telling him that dragons could recognize symptoms and tell their riders so they could summon healers."

"I agree with that," her Mom says; "but that doesn't help our situation right now. I think Andreas is having liver problems. I think that stuff he's throwing up is bile. When you throw up bile, it's not good at all. He could have liver cancer, and that's the worst type of cancer you can have."

"I don't think he has cancer," says Elli scornfully. "People with cancer only vomit when they have chemo or agenothree."

"That's not true, and you know it," Elli's Mom says angrily. "Will you call your fire-lizard so I can send that message? I don't have Oldive's number in my contacts."

"Elizabeth, Marie-Antoinette?" Elli calls as cheerfully as she can muster.

Both queens come arrowing in to land on her shoulders.

"Which one of you would like to take a message to Master Oldive?" Elli inquires. "It's a very important message. We need him to come here as soon as possible!"

Elli tries not to show how distressed she is because she knows her fire-lizards will go bananas if she does. She ties the message to Elizabeth's leg then lifts her arm in the air as she was taught. The moment Elizabeth disappears, Elli breaks down.

"What're we going to do?" she sobs. "I don't know what I would do if he died! He's my child!"

"I know, Elli," her Mom sighs, wrapping her daughter up in a comforting hug, "but it's out of our hands. He needs a doctor, and there're no doctors on Pern. The healers are still learning about modern medicine. There may be nothing we can do about it."

"I can't handle this, Mom," Elli weeps. "I'm pregnant again! Those children will live with the stigma of a dead brother they never knew. I don't want them to go through that hell!"

"Well, that can't be helped if Master Oldive doesn't get here soon."

"Hello?" calls a voice from the doorway.

"Oh, thank God you're here, Master Oldive!" Elli cries, all but throwing herself into his arms. "It's Andreas! He's very sick! He's throwing up what Mom believes to be black bile. He's been sick for a sevenday, but I thought it was the flu."

Elli's Mom transfers Andreas to Oldive's arms.

"I think we need to do some scans," he says, giving Andreas the once over. "I'll have to take him to the Healer Hall because that's where all the new-fangled machines are."

"Please, let me go with you?" Elli begs.

"You can't go _between_, Elli," Oldive says gently. "I'm taking him as fast as possible because I don't know how much time he has left. He's lost a lot of weight."

"He's only one stone," Elli agrees, "but how much is that in pounds?"

"I'm still not familiar with that form of measurement," confesses the Masterhealer.

He is about to speak again, when Andreas vomits all over him.

"Okay, that does it," he says. "N'ton, I'm ready. I'm taking the baby with me. We have to get back to the Healer Hall as soon as possible."

"Where's G'narish?" asks Oldive as he carries the still vomiting child out to bronze Lioth.

"He's sequestered himself because he doesn't want to see his son die," Elli's Mom says in utter disgust.

"I think he should accompany his son to the Healer Hall," Oldive concludes.

"I agree wholeheartedly," says Elli; "but I can't get him out of our weyr."

"We could just take him to the dolphins, Masterhealer," N'ton suggests. "Then, you would be able to tell what's the matter with Andreas just by sonar reading. We wouldn't have to worry about reading scans and waiting forever for the results."

"Good point," agrees Oldive.

"Then we'll take him to this pod right here," Elli offers, grabbing her flying gear. "That way, we can fly straight there."

My rider comes running out to me, hastily throwing on her flying gear. She mounts me and we take off. Despite the urgency of the mission, I can't help feeling pure joy at being back in the air again. I love flying. I especially love flying with Elli on my back. She is my rider, and she is perfect.

As we fly, I go through the symptoms in my mind. Definitely something wrong with the liver, I conclude. The liver is where the bile is produced then stored and concentrated in the gallbladder. If he's vomiting bile that could mean a whole lot of things. It was unlikely that he would have high blood pressure, but he could have extremely low blood pressure. He could have liver cancer like Elli's Mom fears. He probably didn't have fat on the liver. He could need a liver transplant. Those are easy to perform on Earth, but it's never been attempted on Pern. You have to match blood types with the patient to donate your liver, but you could donate a large portion of it without suffering much damage if you take the right medicine. There's also a chance that the patient could reject the new liver, but the patient would have to take medicine to prevent that from happening. I don't even know if they have that kind of medicine on Pern. Would we have the chemicals to mix the right meds? They couldn't replicate Elli's meds, and she went nuts after she ran out of the ones she brought from Earth. I'm getting ahead of myself. We just have to see what the dolphins will say. It might not even be a problem with the liver. It could be a blood problem.

As we land, the Masterhealer dismounts Lioth and rings the bell. The dolphins arrive instantly as the Masterhealer wades into the water, carrying Andreas in his arms. The child has stopped vomiting but looks as though he might do it again.

"Baby very sick!" Natua says excitedly. "Big tumor in the liver. Can-cer! Lots of can-cer!"

Elli bursts into tears.

"We can treat that with Agenothree," the Masterhealer comforts her. "Remember how effective it was for Tiffany?"

"That'll take years of misery and even more vomiting!" she sobs.

"But it will cure him in the end, and that's what you want, isn't it?" Oldive gently asks.

"Of course!" Elli fires back. "He's my son! But how am I going to tell G'narish?"

She buries her face into my neck and weeps.

On the return to Honshu, I fly slowly in deference to her mood. When we land, I gather her into my forelegs and hold her to my chest. She weeps herself to sleep in my forelegs, leaving the task of telling G'narish to her mother. When she wakes, he's there. She gets up groggily to hold her weyrmate.

"Sweetie, are you okay?" she timidly asks. "Did Mom tell you what's going on?"

"Yes. No." G'narish replies, his expression pained.

"Which one?" Elli demands in frustration.

"Yes, Mom told me, and no, I'm most definitely not okay," G'narish angrily replies. "I can't handle this!"

"Neither can I, sweetie-pie," Elli softly speaks, fighting back her tears. "We'll have to handle it together."

"Don't do that," G'narish commands sternly.

"Don't do what?" Elli's voice shakes with the effort of keeping it steady.

"Don't hold back your tears," G'narish softly growls, wrapping his weyrmate up in a tender hug. "You always tell me to let it out. So, now it's my turn."

"Oh, Narish!" Elli sobs, throwing her arms around him. "What're we going to do?"

"We're just going to have to watch him suffer through treatments," G'narish says, fighting back his own tears.

"You filthy hypocrite!" Elli shouts, managing a watery smile. "You tell me not to hold back then you do it yourself."

"One of us has to be strong for the other," he says, clearing his throat.

"Nonsense!" Elli disagrees. "To be strong is to be weak, remember? You say that all the time."

"You're right," G'narish says and lets himself cry.

They hold each other and cry for a long time, until Elli's Mom finds them, sitting together, rocking back-and-forth, clinging to each other for dear life.

"Are you okay? " she asks them.

"What the hell does it look like, Mom?" Elli demands, raising her tear-stained face to look at her mother.

"Even if we're not okay, we're really okay," G'narish says at the same time. "Elli taught me that."

"As a parent, I've never dealt with this before, so I really don't know what it's like," Elli's Mom tells them both. "But now I know what it's like to be a grandmother of a child with cancer, so I will help you as much as I can."

Elli walks to her mom and hugs her, her potbelly getting in the way as she tries for a tight embrace. I bugle to show that I will also be there for her and her weyrmate. She releases Mom and goes out to mine and Gyarmath's ledge. She finds the two of us lounging in the sun, walks to both of us, and hugs us, scratching an eye ridge as she releases us.

"I better inform Tiffany," she tells us. "She should know her nephew has liver cancer."

_I'll do a lesson on cancer from the AIVAS files,_ I say. _I will educate my kind. Those dragons whose riders are healers should know all about it. Ruth should know as well. Sharra isn't his rider, but she can hear and speak to him as well as Jaxom, so he should definitely get that lesson. Rollith should be able to help with this as her rider had cancer. It wasn't liver cancer but it was still cancer, and she would be instrumental in our education._

"Better ask her permission, first," Elli suggests, "and don't forget you still have that mental illness lesson you abandoned today."

_Yes, Mother_, I reply, rumbling in the dragon equivalent of a chuckle.

"How do you think the lessons are going, Masterteacher Chlorith?" G'narish asks me, grinning.

_I think they're going very well_, I tell him. _I quiz my students after every lesson and before the next one, so they get two quizzes a day. Some of the older ones don't remember jack, but the younger ones are retaining everything I teach them. We actually teach each other, but, as it's my idea, I'm the Masterteacher_.

"I thought I heard Gyarmath conducting a lesson the other day," G'narish says. "It was a music lesson."

_Yes_, I reply. _I know Elli has perfect pitch, so, therefore, I have perfect pitch. But you know a lot about music even though you're not a harper, so I let Gyarmath have an opportunity to teach a lesson. What he didn't know I supplemented. I wonder if you have perfect pitch, G'narish?_

"That'll provide a diversion for us for awhile, with Andreas's cancer on all our minds," Elli says, mustering a smile. "What note is this?"

She hums a note.

"That's middle C," G'narish replies.

"Right!" Elli cries excitedly. "What's this?"

She hums a different note.

"That's an F," G'narish responds in a duh voice.

"You do have perfect pitch!" Elli says, clapping him on the back. "Now it's time for you to sing! You never sang for me before."

"I do have a little voice training," G'narish admits. "I begged the Weyrsinger to teach me before I Impressed and even after."

He took a deep breath and began to sing a song of such grief and loss that all the dragons begin to keen as though one of our kind had gone _between_.

"I don't remember that song in the AIVAS files, or in the Pernese records," Elli says. "Of course I haven't heard all the music in the universe, but that one is definitely new to me."

"I composed it myself," G'narish sheepishly admits. "I wrote it when Cassandria suicided. Now it applies to D'nag, Seska, and possibly Andreas."

"Did you bring the record of the song with you when you came forward?" Elli asks. "If you did, I'm taking that right to the printing hall and copying it for the Harper Hall! That song is so eloquent, so poignant, so god damn beautiful!"

"I don't think much of my songs," G'narish says, flattered. "You realy think it's that good?"

"Yes, I do!" Elli says staunchly. "You blow Masters Domick and Menolly out of the water! You really should've been in the Harper Hall with that talent. You would've walked the tables in one day!"

"Okay, that's enough," G'narish tells her, patting Elli on the back. "I'll get it from my stash. I buried it among other private records I kept all these Turns, ever since I Impressed."

"I'd like to see those records if I could," Elli remarks, her curiosity piqued. "We are Weyrmates, after all."

G'narish smiles, takes her hand, and leads her back to our weyr.


	6. Chapter 6 - Dragon's Lament

_**Chapter 6 – Dragon's Lament**_

At night when everybody else is asleep, he sings… long, sad songs that make me weep inside. The songs permeate my rider's dreams and makes her miss singing. She likens his voice to that of the Greek god Apollo, whom I have never heard sing before. She says that's how she imagines he would have sounded like if he would have been real. She wants to stay awake to hear him sing tonight, but if he knows someone human is awake, he will not sing. She wants to be reassured it is not a dream. Elli plans to stay awake anyway to hear him sing.

_ What about using your sonar tape recorder to capture him singing?_ I ask.

"That's a perfect idea!" she replies.

She gets the tape recorder ready. Andreas is sleeping with her because of the cancer. He is small enough to sleep in a bassinet because of the amount of weight loss he's undergone. He sleeps at the foot of the bed, but ofttimes, Elli takes him in her arms and holds him tightly.

"I wish that singer was here to put him to sleep," she says as she readies the first tape.

"Are you going to record all your dreams tonight?" G'narish chuckles weakly.

"I'm going to record that mystery singer, but my dreams will probably get in the way," Elli sighs. "The singing interferes with my dreams, so that won't tell me anything. Chlorith does say it's real and it makes her cry. I don't hear her keen at night, but I do hear weeping accompanying the singing. I wish I could wake up enough to comfort her. I'm not even sure of the song lyrics."

"I hear it in my dreams, too," G'narish reassures her, "and I hear Chlorith crying, too. Perhaps if she joined in the singing, she wouldn't cry so much. You can't cry when you're singing. Your voice loses its key."

"Every time I sing, it stops my tears," Elli admits, adding a shrug for emphasis. "I'm glad because I hate murdering songs!"

G'narish actually laughs as he starts the tape.

"Guess I'll have to put up with the tape recorder being strapped to your waist," he sighs good-naturedly.

"I'll try not to touch you tonight," Elli mutters resignedly. "That's the disadvantage of wearing this thing."

She's asleep within minutes, but G'narish remains awake for a long time, pondering who the mysterious singer might be. He knows it's a dragon, but who is it? It is definitely a male dragon, who sounds oddly familiar. G'narish doesn't have the ability to hear all dragons unless they speak specifically at him, so he jumps to the only conclusion that makes sense, comprehension dawning on his face as he mulls it all over in his brain.

_Yes, it's me,_ Gyarmath admits, embarrassment coloring his tone. _I don't want any humans to hear me sing because I didn't want to show them how sad I am. Dragons are supposed to be happy unless somebody died. I am not supposed to remember old events and lost loved ones, but I do. I do not remember the horrors of Threadfall, but I do remember Claranth. He was my clutchmate, and I remember the queens' battle, in this time as well as in the past, and I had a soft spot for Carth. She was always so sad because she felt her rider was displeased with her for being green instead of gold. She suicided because of Seska's jealousy of her younger sister. She also told me a secret I was supposed to keep from you, but I cannot bear to do so any longer. The cord was not around the baby's neck._

G'narish stiffens. What on Pern is the dragon talking about?

_Nadira took him to see Seska because we were fighting Thread, _Gyarmath informs his rider,_ and Carth's rider grabbed him by the neck and strangled him. Nadira chose not to believe her own eyes. She chose to believe it was an accident. Then she tried to strangle Calentia when she was born, but Calentia survived. Your son obviously did not. She wanted no siblings. Carth died in shame, because she was never good enough for her rider. It is for her that I sing every night. I wish my voice could carry 'between' and comfort her. She deserved much better than she got with her rider. I don't know what she saw in her, to tell you the truth. If she'd've Impressed someone else, none of this would have happened. She would still be alive._

Gyarmath keens, loud and long. He keens for all the hatred in Carth's rider. He keens for the death of the baby and the dragon. He keens that she felt inferior in her rider's eyes. The keening wakens Elli. Mistakenly assuming it is me weeping, she jumps out of bed and rushes out to our ledge.

"Oh, my Chlori," she gushes, "my precious love, what on Pern is the matter?"

_It is not I who weeps, Elli_, I explain, my eyes shading to grey, revealing the extent of my grief. _It is Gyarmath. You probably missed what he was saying, but he's very upset._

"Hey, buddy," Elli cheerily calls to him, walking over to scratch his eye ridges, trying to soothe the inconsolable bronze dragon. "What has happened?"

_He misses Carth_, I explain. _He feels bad that she felt inferior to her rider because of her color._

"I didn't think he'd remember Carth," Elli mutters in sympathy, reaching up to stroke his back.

_Carth thought that if she Impressed Seska_, _she could banish the hatred from her,_ Gyarmath sobs_. Many people change when they Impress their dragons, but Carth's rider never did. I always thought the dragon mirrors the rider, but Carth never did. She did whatever she could to please her rider, but she knew it was wrong, and she was deeply ashamed of it when she flamed down Zareth and Calentia._

_He sings for her every night,_ I add. _She was our daughter. She deserved so much more than she got. Her rider took care of her like she was supposed to, but she wanted Carth to be something she just could not be. Greens cannot be queens._

"Carth never let on that she was feeling so bad," Elli sighs ruefully. "Every time Seska had a meltdown, I'd check on Carth to make sure she was okay, and she always claimed that she was. She would have been better for Calentia, for she mirrored her personality perfectly. They were both so self-effacing and gentle. Zareth has a mischievous streak in her that reminds me of Raeana."

_Calentia needs some spice in her life,_ I tell my rider. _Zareth is bringing out Calentia's mischievous streak. Remember that prank she pulled on G'narish?_

"Who could forget?" Elli responds, grinning. "He was so pissed off!"

_Now he's thinking of doing it again. Whoops. I wasn't supposed to tell you; it was a surprise! Especially because he doesn't know whether he can pull it off._

"I won't let on," Elli smiles at me, then turns back to Gyarmath. Gently, she tells him, "You'll feel a lot better if you can coax him to fight Thread again. You won't have as much time to brood."

_I can't do it anymore,_ Gyarmath mutters sadly, his eyes shading to a pale yellow. _The thoughts that go through G'narish's brain when he fights are too much. I cannot focus when he has his flashbacks._

"But there'll be less and less of those every time you fight," Elli insists gently. "It can only get better from here, Gyarmath. You have to keep thinking that, no matter how bad it is. It can only get better from here. It'll be hard at first, but it'll get better every time he does it. Do it for Carth. Let her know she was a good dragon. Her body may be gone _between_ but her spirit lives on. Be a father and comfort your daughter. She hears you every time you sing. Keep it up, Gy. Keep up the good work. Perhaps Chlorith will sing a duet with you from time to time. You both have the voices of sirens. You make your riders sound like rusty sandpaper in comparison. Sing for us, Gy. Sing Andreas to sleep again. Sing me to sleep again. Sing for all dragons to hear. Be the first dragonharper. Sing for the whole world!"


	7. Chapter 7 - The Dragon Choir

_**Chapter 7 – The Dragon Choir**_

The first person to have arrived here on Pern from Earth has died. Tiffany's Oma passed away in her sleep at the ripe old age of 99. She had been declining for years now, and there was nothing we could do to stop it. It is very seldom that any Pernese has lived past 80… unless they were dragonriders. The first hint we get that something is wrong is when Elli goes to say good morning to Tiffany and F'rangle that morning.

"Good morning, Vietnam!" she shouts gleefully at Tiffany and F'rangle's door as she always does in the morning.

Instead of F'rangle's sleepy groaning of an inquiry as to who on Pern Vietnam is… to which Elli has never given him a satisfactory answer… he says wearily, "Don't come in."

"F'rangle, I'm not going to see you dressing!" Elli says indignantly. You're fine!"

"We're having family time," he growls back at her. "Don't come in."

"Let her in."

Tiffany sounds like she's contracted a bad head cold. Elli flings the door wide open.

"Family time means all of us!" Elli complains angrily. "She's my twinny."

"I'm so happy you're here!" Tiffany breaks into a storm of crying, throwing herself into Elli's arms.

"What happened?" Elli wonders, putting all the sympathy she can muster into her voice.

"I lost Oma!" Tiffany sobs, her words garbled by her weeping.

Elli holds her tightly, putting all the love she can into that long hug. Rollith begins to keen. I take off from my own weyr and land right smack dab in the middle of hers, covering her shoulders with my wing. Elli won't sing, so I do, because I know Tiffany can hear me, too.

"She died in her sleep," Veronika explains, sitting on the bed with them, rubbing Tiffany's back.

"I promised I'd be there when her Oma died," Elli tells Veronika, "and here I am. I told her I'd be there at the funeral to support Tiff in this time of need. I know they were very close. Oma used to help oil Rollith before she got so sick."

"I have to comfort Rollith," Tiffany says, pulling away, "but I don't know how! I can't offer comfort right now when I'm so distraught!"

"Chlorith's doing an excellent job of comforting Rollith right now," Elli gently informs her. "You just get all the comfort you need from us. Then, and only then, can you comfort Rollith."

She relaxes again in Elli's arms, and I begin my song. Gyarmath joins me. I idly think that the dragons should start a choir. Rollith can't sing; she's too distraught. But Aureath, Aurelith, Colinath, Warth, Worth, and Golanth all join in. Despite his rider's lack of a good singing voice, Golanth has an excellent one. It blows his rider out of the water to hear his dragon singing. The dragon mirrors the rider, so Rollith and I are second sopranos. The twins are first sopranos and high trebles. In the case of the bronzes, Gyarmath and Colinath are tenors, and Golanth has a rich bass that does not mirror his rider at all. If only we had an alto, I think to myself. Then we could really get it going on!

Stunned by what she's hearing, Tiffany stops crying almost instantly when the choir breaks into the chorus.

"They're all singing!" she exclaims. "Are they all singing for us?"

"Yes," Elli responds. "The sad thing is that only you and Rollith will hear it."

"They need an alto," Tiffany observes, drying her eyes with the back of her hand.

"I'll do that," says Elli, hearing her hand brush down her face, and she kisses a remaining tear from her cheek. "Rollith is almost as smart as Chlorith. Her memory is just as strong. She will remember Oma for the rest of her life, as we all will."

"She missed making spaetzle!" Tiffany sobs, weeping afresh.

Elli draws her head down to her shoulder again and hums along to the song. When it is over, they beg for another one.

_Hold on, guys,_ I say with a mental chuckle. _We composed that song with our link. I just taught them how to do that._

Gyarmath mentally clears his throat.

_Okay, okay, Gyarmath taught us how to do that,_ I concede_._ _I never composed a song before in my life. In this, and this alone, he is the Masterteacher_.

"Are you saying that song he used to sing at night he composed himself?!" Elli gasps in sheer amazement.

_Yes,_ I tell her.

"Wow!" Elli exclaims. "That's one complex song he made up, and your addition to it gives the singer of the original part reason to hope."

_I learned how to do it because his song was so sad,_ I reply. _I wanted to help him so badly. I wanted him to get it out of his system before anyone else found out who the mystery singer was. Unfortunately, G'narish got there first. He guessed who it was because he could hear the singer and the only other dragon he can hear is female._

"Because it's you, of course," Elli says, grinning.

_Because it is I_, I agree.

"What're you grinning about?" Veronika demands. "Your friend is standing here crying, and you're laughing at her?"

"I'm not laughing at Tiffany!" Elli cries passionately. "I'm grinning at something Chlorith said."

"I heard it," Tiffany lifts her head to look at her mother. "They were having a conversation about music and dragons singing. It had nothing to do with Oma."

"Sometimes I forget that others cannot hear them." Elli sighs ruefully.

"Maybe if you talked out loud to Chlorith," Tiffany suggests, "Mom wouldn't have jumped to conclusions."

"Dad always tells me to keep it quiet," Elli responds.

_And even he would agree that this time you should've spoken_, I tell her.

"Okay, Chlorith, you win!" Elli says aloud.

"What'd she say?" asks Veronika.

"She just agreed with Tiffany," Elli replies, smiling softly.

"What're you going to teach everyone next, Chlorith?" Elli asks, still speaking aloud for the benefit of Veronika, Gr'gor, and Gary.

_I'm going to let Golanth do an astronomy lesson,_ I reply, _as that'll be the next dragon quest after the Pass is over. I still don't know how we're going to manage it, as we're diurnal, not nocturnal, and we need to remain active or we'll get depressed really fast. I understand practicing our telekinesis, but really, when is the next asteroid or comet going to hit us? We'll be spending hundreds of years practicing and not doing anything else!_

"I agree," Elli says, still speaking aloud. "Watchwhers would be more suited to the task, but watchwhers don't have telekinesis, or even the ability to go _between_."

_Watchwhers can go 'between'_, I argue. _They usually have no reason to. A wherhandler is not a dragonrider. You can no more ride a watchwher than a fire-lizard._

"I've heard of people riding watchwhers before," argues Tiffany through her tears. "It's in the records. They never timed it though."

_Okay, you're right, twinrider,_ I say, grinning mentally. _You got me beat, but this just proves my statement… watchwhers are much better suited to this task than dragons._

"Are you going to rebel?" Elli wonders aloud. "Are you going to start a dragon-wide rebellion against the riders and flame the whole lot of us?"

I know Elli's joking, but I still take her seriously.

_We would never flame down people, _I hotly reply_. We shall never stoop down to the level of D'lan and his brainwashed cohorts! That's not funny, and you know it!_

"I know you're not D'lan, Chlorith," Elli apologizes contritely. "You saved all Pern that day when you killed him and Denorth. Don't you start keening now, you know it's true! I'm sorry I brought it up. It's just that you have an opinion that is against the rest of the dragons and riders, and you have a habit of stirring dragons up so that they see your point instead of their riders. In fact, the only dragon who seems really excited about this is Golanth, and that's only because his rider has studied astronomy before. Well I shouldn't exclude Zaranth, but she's no longer at Honshu. She needs to stay at Monaco to fight Thread until the Pass is over. She only visits when she's about to mate, and they've been sequestered of late because Thai's pregnant."

_Wow, you went all over the place, twinrider,_ says Rollith. She has since stopped weeping and is now comforting me. _It's okay, twin. Let it out. I know you're still traumatized by what you had to do to save Pern, but you did the right thing. This is the first time you got angry about it. That's a good thing. That should've happened long ago._

Elli releases her twin to comfort her dragon. I, however, am inconsolable. How dare she think I would stoop to D'lan's level? The fact that it was a joke doesn't help matters any.

"You're okay, Chlori," she says, as though to a young child.

She tries to take my head in her arms, but I toss it away from her. This is probably the first time a dragon ever rejected their rider's caresses.

"Don't be angry with me, Chlori," Elli pleads. "Be angry with D'lan and Denorth. They're the ones who almost destroyed Pern. You stopped that. You're a heroine! You're my heroine! I love you very much, and I should never have made that joke about you flaming people down. That is a tactic of D'lan, and I know I triggered you, but I didn't mean to, Chlori, really I didn't. I'll send it all to you."

I don't want to receive her feelings, but Elli sends them anyway, and, against my will, I realize that she was being sarcastic with her joke, and that she really didn't think I'd stoop to D'lan's level. She is a lot like Mirrim… speak first, think later, and weep for days. I yield to her caresses after that, and my mental tears gradually subside.

"Why don't you sing another song for my twinny?" Elli says, scratching my eye ridges. That'll calm our twins down."

I comply. My mental voice is a little foggy at first, as though I really had been crying, but gradually, it returns to its full glory. Soon the whole impromptu choir joins me, and we once again collaborate on a new song. Neither Elli nor Tiffany can write the ballad down on paper, so Elli gets out her trusty sonar tape recorder and straps it on her waste so it can interface with the implant in her brain. G'narish will hear the tape and write it down later. They'll submit it to the Harper Hall, and the harpers will sing songs created by dragons!


	8. Chapter 8 - Kiss and Make Up

_**Chapter 8 – Kiss and Make Up**_

It takes a long time for everyone to get past Oma's death. Elli's Mom keeps saying how she doesn't want to live that long, and her Dad repeatedly says he'll be next. He's been treated with Agenothree, but he has declined steadily, as the cancer has returned. Elli says he has had part of a lung and a kidney removed due to two kinds of cancer, and he had prostate cancer when he came here, but it was controlled until recently. He couldn't remove the prostate because he had had radiation seeds put in the first time they caught the cancer. Those radioactive seeds had put him in remission, but the cancer had returned. Now it was growing at a steady rate despite the Agenothree treatments. This makes Elli very anxious, because she's afraid Tiffany's cancer will return as well. She hasn't told Tiffany this, but I have told Rollith, and she told Tiffany, who got really mad at Elli for thinking negatively and now will not speak to her. I feel it is my duty to bring them back together because Rollith and I are not fighting at all. We spy on our rider twins so that we can report to our riders and let them know what the other thinks.

_ She is very sad_, I report to my rider. _She cries herself to sleep every night because she thinks she's lost her twinny. You must comfort her._

"But she'll yell at me," Elli protests.

_She promises she won't,_ I assure her. _She just doesn't understand your anxiety. It is logical, as cancer seems to return all the time, even if it goes to a completely different organ the second time around. She's just so positive about her own condition. I believe, from what Rollith tells me, that she's afraid of dying so she doesn't like to think about it at all. She keeps trying to convince herself that she is not going to die until a very old age. Then she'll be safe. She's also concerned about her pregnancy. All the stress she's going through with her grandmother's death and you not speaking to each other is taking its toll on her. You need to make up and be twins again._

This makes Elli sad, and she goes immediately to see her twin. I can tell she's terrified as she knocks on her door.

"Come in?" Tiffany says in a muffled voice. She is crying yet again.

"Twin?" Elli says tentatively. "May I come in? I want to talk to you."

"Twin?" Tiffany all but runs to the door, flings it open, and throws her arms around her twin, sobbing hysterically.

"Shh, shh, twin, it's okay. I'm sorry I doubted you. It's just that cancer runs in my family, so I know its habits. I know how it works because of you, so I logically thought that this might be a brief respite and that it'll come back again with a vengeance. If that happens, I will lose my twinny-twin-twin, and that I will be alone again. I can't live without you. Otherwise, I wouldn't have begged you to come to Pern with us. I need to be with you even though I have G'narish with me 24/7. He's my husband, but you're my twinny. I can't live without my twinny! I don't want to be a twinless twin!"

"But you won't be!" Tiffany cries passionately. "How many times do I have to tell you that I'm going to be okay? So what if the cancer comes back? I'll beat it just like I did the first time! What I'm worried about coming back is the Barrett's Esophagus or the Gastroparesis. They don't have a solution for that. Otherwise, I'd have been on a feeding tube from the minute we landed on Pern."

"There has to be a diagram of how to install a feeding tube in the AIVAS files," Elli says brightly. "They probably just haven't found it yet because the files are so extensive. It's a good thing your dad and brother created a website to hold all the research stuff. They also created one to hold all the recordings, but that's beside the point. Didn't they call it ? I can't believe how many sites are created already. They even have a Pernese version of Facebook, and they've kept the original name. They won't worry about copyright infringement because the original site is over 4000 Turns old in this time. I'm on it, and so are you, (but you haven't posted anything!)-Elli adds with mock severity.—"and they have a YouTube duplicate with all the recordings stored in the AIVAS files, both audio and video, and you can add your own recordings. I'm going to hook my new phone up to my implant tonight and record the Dragon Choir. Then, I can submit that to YouTube. Good thing you can submit audio recordings to both YouTube and Facebook. You couldn't do that on Earth in our time."

"You're babbling!" Tiffany cries happily, slapping her twin's shoulder.

Elli gives her another hug.

"Let's kick the men out of our quarters and sleep together tonight," Elli says happily. "Whose weyr should we use?"

"The only problem with that is that men don't sleep together the way women do unless they're… you know… gay." Tiffany replies.

"We have a spare room for one of them," Elli reassures her. "G'narish and F'rangle are friends, but there's no way in hell their friendship is going to be like that of G'narish and D'nag. G'narish is afraid of replacing D'nag so he doesn't let himself get too close."

"What about replacing Nadira?" Tiffany demands.

"That's different, because Nadira and I would've clashed on all counts," Elli tells her. "Danala was right about one thing. Nadira was too docile to do much of anything. I'm docile and shy when it comes to other people's feelings, but I'm definitely not shy or docile when something needs to be done."

"You didn't tell me you were worried," Tiffany informs her twin. "Your dragon did that for you."

"I didn't want to worry or upset you," Elli apologizes, but you can't keep a secret in front of your dragon. I didn't think she'd tell your dragon if I confided in her, but she seems to think that Rollith and you both needed to know how I was feeling. I usually don't hide anything from you, but I knew you would get mad at me if I told you this."

"I was more upset because you didn't tell me," Tiffany complains, her eyes welling up with tears again.

"I'm sorry, Twin," Elli apologizes, putting an arm around her shoulders again. "I should've realized I can't keep anything from you with our dragons as tight as they are."

"They're only tight because we are," says Tiffany. "The dragon mirrors the rider."

"Not all the time, twin," Elli disagrees. "What about Karenth and Danala? What about Carth and Seska? And Denorth most certainly wouldn't have flamed down people and dragons if D'lan hadn't implanted that subliminal programming in his brain."

Elli's inadvertent mention of D'lan and Denorth sets me keening again.

"Oh shit!" Elli shouts, whirling around. "Be right back, twin. Now I have to kiss up to Chlorith."

"I'll come with you!" Tiffany shouts, running faster than she had ever run during my lifetime.

She has a problem walking.

"You'll hurt yourself doing that!" Elli yells fruitlessly as Tiffany gathers speed for the short sprint to our weyr.

Tiffany scratches my eye ridges while Elli takes my head in her arms.

"You did the right thing, sweet love," she croons to me. "You saved Pern! You won a major victory that day. You did what you knew was right. I love you, heroine of Pern. You're the best dragon in the universe! You did the right thing."

_But I killed someone!_ I wail piteously. _I killed a human being and his dragon! Dragons are not supposed to take lives except for Thread and herdbeasts and wherries!_

"But if you hadn't taken his life, he would've taken yours," Tiffany adds severely. "Or he would've turned you into one of those dragon zombies. I hate pity parties!"

"This isn't a pity party, Twin, this is a trauma!" Elli says with equal severity. "Wouldn't you be traumatized if you killed somebody?"

"G'narish isn't traumatized and he killed two people," Tiffany argues.

"G'narish has nightmares about it every night, and I go through this with him all the time," Elli replies. "Toric and Eliana both needed to die, but every night G'narish sees the life draining out of them, and he wakes up screaming. When he isn't having nightmares about that, he's having nightmares about D'nag's death. That man needs some serious help!"

"I thought Gyarmath's sad songs helped him sleep better," my twinrider says.

"He falls asleep more easily, but he still has nightmares," my rider says compassionately. "He is still very sad and very scared. He doesn't know how to help himself get over his fear. We tried desensitization but that seems to make it worse instead of better."

"Keep trying, twin," Tiff says. "It'll get worse before it gets better. Remember our role play? That was psychologically accurate, as we did research on it before we acted out the parts."

"I just never expected to see it in real life," Elli says soberly. "Gyarmath isn't traumatized. He's just distraught whenever G'narish has flashbacks, because he can't hear his rider's thoughts. His mind is somewhere else entirely, and I doubt he can hear his own dragon. He pleads for Gyarmath to save D'nag, but of course he can't. Gyarmath actually wonders if G'narish blames him for D'nag's death, because he didn't flame at the clump of Thread before it ate him up."

"Does G'narish know that?" asks Tiffany sharply.

"Of course not! That'd only make him worse!" Elli cries indignantly. "To know that kind of thing would make him a million times worse! Adding that guilt on top of the guilt he already feels would destroy him! He has nightmares that D'nag's spirit blames him for his death because he didn't get there fast enough to save him."

Tiffany stops. She hadn't known that.

"Why didn't you tell me, twin?" she demands passionately. "I could've set him straight on that score right away!"

"You think I haven't tried?" Elli demands indignantly. "I tell him that every night he has what we call blame dreams. The only one he knows doesn't blame him is his dragon, but Gyarmath fears the reverse."

"Have you tried to reassure him?" Tiffany asks in a gentler tone.

"Of course, I have!" Elli hotly replies. "I wouldn't let something like that slide! But I think he'll only be convinced that G'narish doesn't blame him if he hears it from his rider."

"Then you need to tell G'narish about Gyarmath's fears and have him reassure his dragon. He doesn't blame Gyarmath, does he?"

"Of course not!" Elli cries indignantly. "He blames himself instead!"

"Self-blame is akin to self-hatred and self-pity," Tiffany says.

"It's survivor's guilt," Elli quietly replies. "Really, someone on Pern ought to know about psychology. There's got to be some things on . Someone ought to be adding a mental-health branch to the Healer Hall sometime soon! I hope G'narish is the first patient when that hall is built!"

"Not to change the subject," Tiffany says tentatively, "but didn't Ariana say something about dragon twins before they Hatched?"

"Yeah, so what?" Elli wonders. "That was three years ago."

"Well, she said something today about your dad dying."

"Dad keeps saying he's going to die, and she is very fond of him, so all he's doing is spiking her fears."

"She was crying when she said it," Tiffany reports. "She came to me because I told her about how I get sick to my stomach before something bad happens. She said she saw him dying."

"Nonsense!" Elli says cheerfully. "He still has a good 10 years ahead of him."

"Not everybody lives into their 90s like Oma," Tiffany gently rebukes my rider. "Not everybody has longevity."

"I know, but Dad's too stubborn to die," Elli replies. "He's like you, only with the wrong attitude. He wants to die, so God'll keep him alive."

"I had that sense of prescience before Oma died," Tiffany stubbornly asserts, "and I'm having it now."

"As much as you like to believe it, twin, you're not a clairvoyant," Elli scoffs.

"Explain 9/11 then, twin. How did I know my dad had a flight that day?"

"Perhaps they told you and they just don't remember it."

"They didn't, I swear by the First Egg!" Tiffany shouts. "I told you that! I'm psychic if you want to call it that!"

"'Call it what you want to call it, I'm an effing alcoholic,'" quotes Elli, which makes Tiffany laugh and lightens the atmosphere considerably.

"I don't know what that song is, but Tina quoted it once, and I fell in love immediately. Just like that quote, 'I'm going to shove your head so far down your torso that you'll have to unzip your pants to say hello.' I don't know what movie that's from, but when Beth said it to Kristin over E-voice, I remembered it for the rest of my life."

"'I will come there, remove your penis, so Loren will never obtain any use from it, and I'll shove it down your throat!'" Tiffany quotes.

"I have yet to share that one with G'narish," Elli says. "I don't know if he'd appreciate it. D'nag threw some very sexual comments out that night G'narish invited him to our weyr, but that one was sort of a threat. It was a joking threat, but it was still a threat! Sean Wailan was upset that Monis Allen might not be able to go to a party my camp friends were hosting in Madison. I wanted to go, but I was sure Mom wouldn't drive me to Madison for the party, so I didn't even ask her. Kristin wasn't going either because she lived all the way in Ashland for Pete's sake, so it'd be a six-hour drive for her, whereas it'd only be a two-hour drive for me. If I'd've had Chlorith back then, I'd've definitely made it to that party! I don't know if I would've had a good time because those people always used to make fun of my behaviors."

"And I never did," Tiffany gently responds.

"Not even when I had the tantrum at the bowling alley because they didn't sell milk," Elli adds, cringing a little. "I'm embarrassed just thinking about it now. I was horrible as a 12-year-old, and you still put up with me."

_I love you, Elli_, I say gently. _I am your true friend, as well. I know everything about you, including the outrageous quotes you throw at each other._

"I know, my gentle, precious queen," Elli sighs happily. "I no longer care about being popular. The fact that I am popular now is moot. I have true friends and family here who put up with my quirks without judging me. They were very judgmental at the center. It was like everyone I met on Earth was very judgmental. Here on Pern, they don't care about my social abnormalities. They put up with them. I'm so happy here! I've never been so happy in my life, despite my stress and strife. I don't need meds to make me happy anymore. I have my Chlorith, and I have you!"

Tiffany smiles back at her twin and hugs her. Elli releases my head to hug her twin back.


	9. Chapter 9 - Prescient Fears

_**Chapter 9 – Prescient Fears**_

Elli's Dad passes away the very next day, leaving her in complete disarray. She doesn't know what to do. For one thing, her father just died. For another, she has to admit to being wrong, which is hard for any human. Instead of being sad about all this, she is angry. She just wants to be alone. I want to cry for her, but I'm afraid that'll make her worse. I don't even sing, because she's screaming at everyone to shut up and leave her alone. Many well-meaning people try to comfort her, but she pushes them all away in an attempt to hide her tears.

_ Why are you pushing everybody away?_ I ask tentatively.

"Because I don't want to admit Tiffany was right!" Elli fires back at me. "I don't believe in clairvoyance. It doesn't exist! It's just coincidence that he died when Ariana said he was going to."

_And what about the twins?_ I ask, tentatively.

"Coincidence!" she shouts.

Her mental tone is so full of denial that I don't press the point. I see an emotion she is attempting vainly to hide… fear. She's terrified to death of precognition. She's afraid of whatever her twin or her daughter predicting coming true. It's happened more times than they can count with Tiffany, and it's happened twice with Ariana. Tiffany has been unable to predict exactly what would happen when she became sick to her stomach, but Ariana was able to put her predictions into words. Elli's afraid that whatever Ariana says will happen will definitely happen, and there's nothing she can do about it. Elli likes to have everything under her control, not to be a tyrant, but to make sure everything's okay to her satisfaction. She felt guilty for avoiding her Dad at all cost but did it because of his attitude toward life. Now she can't say what she wanted to say… how terrible she feels that she didn't offer him help. She and her Dad used to be very close until he lost his job and basically gave up on life. Then she thought him a filthy hypocrite because he'd yell at her for being lazy when he was lazy himself and spent all his time on the computer or phone or tablet. She's angry at him for taking that direction in life, but she also feels sorry for him and doesn't want to admit it.

"I didn't want anyone to know what I am feeling," she sobs, breaking down entirely, realizing in that moment that I can see her emotions and empathize with her. "But how can I keep it from my lifemate?"

She runs into my weyr and flings herself across my body. I flip over and gather her into my forelegs.

_Clairvoyance is a thing, Elli_, I say gently. _Dragons don't have it themselves, but there have been records of dragonriders who have had it. Jerana, rider of queen Lezpanth was the first to have it. She was only 10 when she Impressed, and Lezpanth was a queen who hatched from a green. She was one of the many dragons who were Hatched after the dragon plague. You really should AIVAS it._

"How did you learn about that?" Elli is so amazed once again, that she stops weeping.

_Lessa studies the queen riders of the past,_ I tell her. _I got the information from Ramoth, who extracted it from Lessa's mind._

"I think I will AIVAS that story," Elli says, calming down. "But, first, I have to apologize to about 20 people who were only trying to help me. I really should admit that I'm terrified of any other predictions coming true. I never witnessed it with Tiffany; I was just told afterward with 9/11. She told me how she burst into tears and told her mother how her father had a flight that day. She was so scared she made herself sick that day. Two months later her father casually remarked that he had a flight that day but that it was canceled beforehand. Veronika asked Gary if he had told Tiffany that, but he told her no. I didn't know any of this shit until about a year afterward. With Ariana's twin prediction, I was sure she was just addled from the Fire-head. She had it even worse than I did, and I had a pretty bad case. Neither of us were supposed to live. When she told Tiffany Dad was going to die today, I thought she just had a nightmare about it. Then it happened. I'm scared, Chlori! I'm so scared!"

And she dissolves into tears again… just as there's a knock on the door.

"Come in," Elli says softly.

"It's G'narish, F'rangle, and Tiffany." G'narish's voice is gentle but insistent.

Still weeping, Elli gets up and answers the door. She throws herself into each of their arms with apologies, then promises to tell everyone why she pushed them all away when she has them all sitting down.

"Ariana gets it from my side of the family," G'narish says very gently and even tentatively. "My mother was a clairvoyant. She predicted the death of her dragon. She predicted Petra's usurpation attempt. If she'd've done something about it, that prediction wouldn't have come true. But she said no matter what she tried to do, it wouldn't prevent it."

"Nobody in Tiffany's family has any trace of prescience," Elli remarks.

"Besides, I can't tell you what's going to happen," Tiffany adds. "I can only tell you something bad's about to happen. I had that sick feeling in my stomach for a couple of days. I didn't tell anyone because I didn't know why I felt that way. Then, when Ariana came to me about your dad dying, I knew that's what was causing it."

"Couldn't it have been from the pregnancy?" Elli pleads with her twin.

"Not that kind of sickness," Tiffany sighs ruefully. "I know that's the feeling I get when something bad is about to happen, but I never know what it is until it happens. With 9/11, for example, I thought the bad feeling was coming because the plane was going to crash on my way home from New York. When that didn't happen, I didn't know what was causing it until I was told that we'd been attacked by terrorists. I never know what's causing it until it happens."

"Ariana's abilities, though," F'rangle injects, "are a lot more defined. Until I met her, I didn't believe in precognition, either. Now I wonder why the dragons don't have it. It's one of the four main psychic abilities."

"AIVAS didn't seem to regard it as a psychic ability," G'narish growls with some heat. "I thought of telling him about my mother, but I decided against it. I always keep my mouth shut when I should open it."

"G'narish, you're so phlegmatic." Elli says fondly. "You really should get angry more often."

"Oh,please, don't make me angry!" G'narish cries, sudden fear clouding his face. "You don't want to see me when I'm angry!"

"That's so Incredible Hulk!" Elli laughs.

"Elli, he's serious," F'rangle cautions her. "I think he's going into a flashback."

"Oh shards!" Elli curses before turning to him. "What's the matter?"

"I killed them!" he hisses. "I killed them! I took their lives! Dragonriders don't take lives!"

"Toric would've taken all our lives that day," Elli gently reminds him, "and Eliana would've killed your daughter. "You'd have killed Seska too if she weren't already on the verge of death. You did what you had to do. Toric was about to kill me because I was an abomination. He invaded Honshu to kill all of us, and you stopped that! Your actions saved Pern that day. We were moving forward, and he wanted to stop it. Now we have no fear of moving forward at all. Once Toric died, the Abominators went meekly to their place of exile."

"But I shed his blood!" G'narish's voice rises to a fever pitch. "I got it all over me!"

"And you had to in order to stop him!" Elli gushes sympathetically. "You're a hero! You saved my life! You saved all our lives!"

"But I didn't need to kill Eliana!" G'narish starts to cry.

"Yes, you did," Elli tenderly assures him, moving to hold him in her arms. "If you hadn't killed her, she would've succeeded in killing Calentia."

"This is what I'm talking about," she explains, turning to Tiffany and F'rangle. "This is what I have to deal with on a daily basis. They need to add a mental health unit to every Healer Hall on Pern so that we can minister to those needs."

_I will help with that,_ I say softly. _All dragons should help with that. Gyarmath needs help, too. He sleeps now, but he will wake up before the flashback is over._

"I hear him," Elli mutters. "He's whimpering. Does he still think G'narish blames him for D'nag's death?"

_Yes, he does,_ I say in a low voice. _His poor heart cries constantly. He will never be happy until he knows without a doubt that G'narish doesn't blame him. I can say this now because he's still in his flashback, and he can't hear any dragons when he's in his flashbacks._

"Narish," Elli calls out tentatively. "I think you need to comfort Gyarmath. He's very sad. He thinks you blame him for D'nag's death because he didn't flame down the clump of Thread fast enough."

G'narish rocks back and forth, oblivious to Elli's words, whispering over and over again, "I killed them, I shed their blood."

"I guess we'll have to wait until the flashback passes," F'rangle mutters ruefully.

"There's got to be a way to snap him out of his flashbacks!" Tiffany says passionately. "My twin should not have to deal with this day in, day out!"

"Shh!" Elli hisses warningly. "He might hear you. Don't talk about him behind his back!"

But G'narish is oblivious to the conversation going on around him. He is unaware of Elli's arms around him. He is ignorant of the fact that Gyarmath's whimpers have turned into outright keens. Elli's torn between staying with G'narish and comforting Gyarmath.

_You can do both_, I remind her. _Hold G'narish and comfort Gy telepathically._

"Dragons need physical contact, too," Elli protests.

_To comfort the rider is to comfort the dragon,_ I reply. _You should know that by now._

"Gy, sweetheart, it's okay," Elli gently reaches out to her weyrmate's dragon. "It's just a flashback. It'll be over soon. Are you sure you can't get him out of it? Have you even tried?"

_Yes and yes,_ Gyarmath moans. _I've tried everything. I think he does this because it's my fault!_

"Okay, stop that crap right now!" Elli yells aloud, hoping to make an impression on both dragon and rider with the volume of her voice. "First of all, that's not even the flashback he's having, and second of all, it is no one's fault D'nag died of Threadscore! He was in the wrong place at the wrong time! It is not G'narish's fault that he died, and it is not Gyarmath's fault that he didn't flame the clump of Thread in time. If he had, D'nag and Claranth would've died of phosphine burns instead of Threadscore! Stop blaming yourselves and each other for something that was completely unpreventable!"

"I never blamed Gyarmath!" G'narish growls, his anger that flared up so rarely was now on full throttle. Turning to Elli, he demands, "How dare you think I blame my dragon for my brother's death?"

"I don't think you do, G'narish," Elli softly replies, taken a bit aback by his anger. "I said that at that volume because Gyarmath thinks you blame him and that's why you have flashbacks. I spoke at that volume to snap you out of that flashback. I really didn't think it'd work, but it did, and now you're mad at me."

"You're damn right I'm…"

As abruptly as the rage forms, it dissipates.

"Gyarmath blames himself and thinks I blame him, probably because I blame myself for it," G'narish slowly mutters, shaking his head. "I never knew my dragon thought I blamed him. Why?"

"Because he can't hear you during your flashbacks," Elli explains in a low voice. "Your mind goes somewhere else that he can't reach. If I trigger on stairs with no railings, Chlorith can't hear me either, can you, Chlorith?"

_It's better now, but I still can't penetrate your thoughts, _I say. _I can't be there to comfort you when you have panic attacks. Mental illness prevents dragons from approaching their riders when it is activated._

"You mean when the symptoms are manifested," Elli chuckles. "The symptoms aren't activated like computer programs!"

Giving her weyrmate another hug, she added, "I just wish I could do something about mine and G'narish's symptoms. I wish I could reach out to all Pern and see if anyone else is suffering from mental illness. There've got to be others. This planet has to be about the same size as Earth. Mental illness doesn't discriminate between an industrialized society or an agrarian one… like this one… any more than it discriminates between age, sex, status, designation, or any other label you can put on a person. I even wonder if dragons can contract mental illness. Gyarmath might have it because his rider has it, but you don't have it, Chlorith."

_No,_ I agree, _but yours was contracted before you came here. G'narish and Gyarmath contracted theirs together. G'narish didn't have a mental illness until he saw D'nag die and when he killed Toric and Eliana._

G'narish is weeping again. Elli tries to hold him, but he gently pushes her away.

"I have to be with my dragon," he mumbles, and shakily walks out of the room.

"At least Gyarmath's mental illness might be cured today," Elli sighs, but I can tell she's hurt that G'narish didn't accept her help.

He makes his slow progress into our weyr and flings himself onto his dragon's neck, burying his face into his back. They weep together for the loss of their friends as they had never done before. I can tell Elli wants to go to them, but Tiffany puts a restraining hand on her arm.

"Let them cry," she tells her twin. "Let them grieve together. They need to do this. It's the first step in the healing process. G'narish had no clue that Gyarmath had blamed himself and thought that G'narish had blamed him for the loss. He needs to absorb that information into his head. Why don't you go comfort your family?"

"They won't accept comfort from me," Elli mutters sadly. "I feel so uncomfortable comforting them anyway. They're supposed to be the strong ones while I'm the weak, blind woman. They'd never accept comfort from me."

"You don't know that, twin," Tiffany gently replies. "I accept comfort from you. I don't know what I would've done without you when Oma died."

Elli obediently leaves the room and goes in search of her family. She finds them all gathered together in the main hall, just sitting silently.

"Finally, you join us!" Tina explodes, venting her anger.

"I didn't think you wanted me," Elli mumbles.

"Of course, we want you!" her Mom cries indignantly. "What makes you think we didn't?"

"I'm the poor, weak, blind burden who can't get anything accomplished," Elli tells them, tears running down her face. "I'm the self-entitled bitch who'd rather have everyone do everything for her."

"You've changed since you Impressed Chlorith," her Mom tells her, putting a comforting arm around Elli's shoulders. "Chlorith did for you what Louisiana did not. Even Dad and Tina say so."

"Does Elsie have a new weyrmate yet?" Elli nervously inquires.

"No," Elsie replies. "My queen hasn't risen to mate again since the exile, but I'm okay with that. I'm already plowed for the season as the vulgar holders would say."

"I'm going to be a great-aunt?" Elli gasps, her angry reluctance transforming into pure excitement and joy. Then, she turns stern. "You didn't go _between_, did you?"

"No," Elsie assures her, giving Elli a hug. "I flew straight from Igen. I relocated after the exile. I wanted to be near Yaya. She's senior Weyrwoman."

"I knew that much," Elli admits, adding a shrug. "Yaya, how are you? Did she make it here?"

"I flew straight, too," she says, giving Elli her own hug. "I'm pretty near my time. I wanted Grandpa to see my new baby."

Elli puts her arms around her daughter and pulls her head down to her shoulder, saying, "We should've done a lot of things where Papa's concerned. But he wasn't an easy man to get along with. Most of us just avoided him as much as possible. He was very grouchy all the time. I saw him as being weak, when instead, he was just old. Old age hurts. I'm actually surprised I'm not showing it right now. I'm 50 years old. I should be showing signs of aging."

_You aren't,_ I tell her fondly, _because you're a dragonrider now. You can come back now if you want._

"I've a better idea," Elli tell me. "Tell G'narish where I am and have him join us. He's family, too, you know. He's more family than Dave ever was!"

A few minutes later, not only does G'narish join the group, but Tiffany and F'rangle also join them. They can tell F'rangle's not sure about it, so they do everything in their power to make him comfortable, including getting out the Pernese version of Cards against Humanity. Even Elli's Mom has a good time playing with them. Elli had taken each card and put them in her slate and stylus so she could braille them for herself so that she wouldn't have to ask for help playing the game. She was happy again… she was included. She was loved, and she wasn't judged!


	10. Chapter 10 - A Timely Rescue

_**Chapter 10 – A Timely Rescue**_

Once the blame session is over, Elli heads to our ledge to see if she can comfort dragon and rider. She has been distraught that she couldn't comfort them when she heard them weeping. She knows G'narish is devastated that his own dragon thought he blamed him for D'nag's death.

"Are you okay?" she asks, coming up to the pair who are standing there, immersed in each other.

"I'm okay, Elli," he replies in a choked voice. "Even when I'm not okay, I'm really okay, because things always end up okay in the end. I won't suicide, so I'll heal somehow. I have to for my dragon. Oh, if only I could go back in time and save him!"

"I will," a small voice speaks up.

Ariana approaches her parents, tapping her cane so that she doesn't fall off the ledge.

"You've never even fought Thread before!" G'narish cries in wonder. Then, turning on his best father voice, he adds, "Absolutely out of the question! Nope. No way. Nada!"

"You can't stop me!" the little girl cries rebelliously. "I've already done it!"

"How do you know that?" Elli demands in her best bossy mother voice. "He isn't here, is he?"

"Not yet," Ariana firmly replies, "but he will be here in approximately two hours. I've seen myself going, and we come back. He's very badly hurt, but he survives, at least for a while."

"Does he die, Ari?" G'narish's voice goes as soft as gently falling snow.

"I haven't seen it, but that doesn't mean it won't happen," Ariana quietly replies. "He stays alive for a long time before he dies if he does. He is also dramatized by Thread because it almost killed him."

"That's 'traumatized', sweetheart, not 'dramatized'," Elli gently corrects her.

"But I didn't see any other queens in our wing!" G'narish argues, shaking his head.

_I saw two,_ Gyarmath remembers suddenly. _I saw who I thought was Chlorith flaming the Thread, but there was a little girl on her back. Then I saw Chlorith again, this time with Elli on her back, dancing up to rescue us, because you were in shock._

"Shards and Shells!" G'narish explodes, suddenly furious. "Why didn't you tell me that before? "You could've saved me a lot of grief!"

_I only remembered when Ariana said something,_ Gyarmath plaintively replies. _Such is the way with us dragons, especially the older ones. They were Hatched before we had evolved enough to remember things. We still don't remember the horrors of fighting Thread like our riders do, but we are beginning to remember other things that happened to us and trivial facts about the world around us. I must be the first of my kind to have this improved memory. I'm often frustrated with my pupils for their poor memories. There's got to be a way to expand their memories._

Ariana leaves the ledge and calls her dragon. Aureath answers that she's in her weyr, so Ariana heads that way.

"Are you just going to let her go?!" Elli demands of G'narish.

"If she's seen it, it's impossible to stop it," he mutters, shaking his head in resignation.

"What if she hasn't really seen it at all?" Elli demands. "What if this was just her way of begging permission?"

"Ori would do something like that, not Ari," G'narish sighs.

Elli can tell he's excited by the possibility. What wouldn't he do to get his friend back?

"You can't let her go!" Elli cries passionately, seizing his arm. "She's nine years old! She wouldn't know what to do with a flamethrower on her back, and she'd need one to get rid of that Thread clump!"

"Someone older should go with her to get rid of that Thread," G'narish agrees, but the sound of dragon wings distracts him.

Little Ari, possibly a gifted precog, has had the last word.

Even I am tense as we wait for her to come back. Five minutes pass, then 10 ... 15, ... 20, ... The worried parents begin to pace. What if her vision had been wrong and she kills herself trying to save D'nag? Neither of them could stand to lose a child. They have already lost Seska. Even though her actions had been what had killed her more than anything else, they still grieve for her loss.

G'narish begins to weep, but Elli is too distraught to comfort him. She holds him tightly and weeps with him.

"What'll Ori do without a twin?" Elli wails. "The only grief worse than a parent's is a twin's!"

"At least she will be able to do things on her own now," G'narish offers.

He is trying to put some humor into the situation, but neither of their tears turn to laughter. I croon reassuringly.

_Everything'll be okay,_ I gently say. _Trust our daughters. They know what they are doing._

"Aureath is mature but Ariana is not!" Elli yells at me. "She's nine years… Turns… old! How would she know what she's doing here? If this were another mission that didn't involve Threadfall, I'd be more than willing to send her, but she has to destroy a huge clump of Thread without ever being trained how to do it. And to make things worse, she'll be in the upper wings where she doesn't belong in the first place, and she doesn't even have a flamethrower!"

_She picked one up before she left,_ I tell my rider calmingly.

"Okay, so she has a flamethrower!" Elli says dismissively. "But she can't use it! She's never even used one before!"

_I listen,_ I inform her.

"But she's going back three Turns!" Elli protests. "You won't be able to hear her when she's back in time."

I have no answer to that. Even though she is distraught, Elli is talking sense. She clings tightly to her weyrmate, wishing for a Lorazepam to calm her down. They pace the floor in each other's arms. That's where Tiffany finds them.

"What's going on?" she worriedly asks.

"Ariana has gone back in time to save D'nag," Elli sobs. "She seems to think she saw herself doing it!"

"She's far too young to do something like that," Tiffany declares.

"Chlorith seems to think she knows what she's doing, but she most certainly does not!" Elli weeps. "She never had training fighting Thread because she's too young to join a fighting wing. She's never used a flamethrower, and she'd have a hard time with it, because it'd be far too heavy for her. There're reasons why children don't Impress dragons!"

_You're always thinking so negatively,_ I tell my rider. _She said it would take approximately two hours for her to get back. They come. He is badly hurt._

At that pronouncement, Elli jumps up. The sound of dragon wings breaks through their sorrow, and they look up hopefully.

"It's Aureath and Claranth!" G'narish screams, clambering down the ledge, half falling down in his eagerness to see the new arrivals.

D'nag is a bloody mess! He is barely conscious. Aureath is supporting Claranth who looks as though he could go _between_ any second now.

_Stay with us_, Aureath cries. _You are three Turns in the future. You were rescued from a heavy clump of Thread that would've killed you if we hadn't saved you. My rider is good with a flamethrower, and I'm an excellent dancer._

"Chlorith?" D'nag says weakly. "Is that Chlorith talking to Claranth? Where am I? This Isn't Igen."

"No, D'nag," G'narish weeps, relieving Ari of her burden. "This is Honshu. I came here after I thought you died. We've been living here ever since. Oh, there's a lot to tell you!"

He throws his arms around his pseudo brother and carries him to the weyr next door to us where he deposits him on the bed.

"You'll heal," G'narish nearly weeps, squeezing his brother's hand. "I'll make sure of it!"

"Why didn't anyone rescue me in my own time?" D'nag demands, making a massive effort to speak.

"Because we thought you had been obliterated by Thread," G'narish replies. "Little Ariana has the sight… prescience… precognition. She said we only thought we saw you being obliterated, but she rescued you."

"I didn't even see her coming!" D'nag cries.

"I didn't see a queen up there until Chlorith rescued us," G'narish explains, shaking his head, dislodging some of the tears from his face, "because I was in shock after what I thought I saw."

"I can't do it anymore, Nar," D'nag softly whispers. "That clump really got me. I could've been killed. I had a close shave, and now she's Threadscored, too."

He breaks down in his brother's arms.

"I haven't seen you cry since you Impressed Claranth!" G'narish says, completely astonished by this uncharacteristic show of emotion.

"I'm sorry." D'nag apologizes, trying to stem the flood of tears. "I can't help it. I'm so scared!"

"I was traumatized by what I thought I saw, too," G'narish admits, once more squeezing D'nag's hand. "I've had massive flashbacks where I'd cling to Elli, thinking she was you, and she'd literally disintegrate in my arms. I couldn't save you, but my nine-Turn-old daughter did!"

"Whose dragon did she borrow?" D'nag begs him answer.

"Her own," G'narish chuckles, still a bit disbelieving. "Chlorith and Rollith both hatched twin queens and she Impressed one of them. She won't fight until she's 16, and there was a great deal of controversy because they Impressed at such a young age, but they've really matured nicely with their dragons. A'dan and M'chael can't get it up during mating flights, so they end up just hugging and kissing each other. Miroirth and Zareth both clutched twin bronze eggs. Zareth's twin bronzes were exiled because their riders were acting like Oldtimers, but A'dan and M'chael Impressed at the same time Ari and Ori did."

There is a joy in G'narish's voice that neither Elli nor I have heard there in such a long time. Elli goes and gets her sonar tape recorder.

"Did I do a good job, Mama?" asks Ariana plaintively.

"I really should ground you," Elli says with mock severity, "but I'm not going to. You deserve a reward for doing what you did. You couldn't have done it three Turns ago, because everyone thought D'nag was dead, but he would've been safe in this time. He wouldn't double up on himself coming back."

"Aureath always knows when she is, just like Ruth," Ariana says proudly. "She made me come back two hours after I left so that I wouldn't double up on myself on the return trip."

"Wise move on her part," Elli agrees, "but you had us all worried! I wanted meds to calm myself down for the first time since Impressing Chlorith. I mean, what if you were obliterated by that chunk of Thread?"

"I got above it and flamed it so that D'nag could fly alongside me and I could bring him back," Ariana explains. "Trouble is, the Thread got him before I could flame it. It wasn't as bad as it could've been, but I think I might've singed him with my flamethrower."

"We'll have Brekke check on him," Elli comments, giving her daughter a grateful hug. "I think she's better at healing Threadscores than Sharra. Want to go get her yourself?"

"Okay, but I think the Thread got me, too."

"Well, the worst of that will go away _between_, but you'll be okay," Elli reassures her daughter. "I'll go tell Manora to ready Honshu for a feast of grand proportions! D'nag's return to life should be epically celebrated, as you saved him! You're a heroine for all three of us!"

Manora and the rest of the Honshu staff put on a feast to rival the best Hatching Day celebrations! The proud parents couldn't praise their precious daughter enough. And, thanks to Ariana's now acknowledged precognitive gift, an end to the flashbacks and stress their little family had been living under had been successfully dealt with. The residents of Honshu really did have a lot to celebrate now!

****** THE END ******


End file.
